Here’s a story I’m hearing more of these days:
A woman (young or old) is divorced (or not) and has decided she’s done with men and it’s time to try women. It’s a version of “Orange Is the New Black,” except she’s not locked up in prison with only women around, but maybe she’s been watching the show, along with a few others and her curiosity is out of control.
You’ve heard this one, right?
So, are you interested in dating a bi-curious woman? Dating a bi-curious woman could be an adventure, a nightmare, or a version of both.
Let’s talk
1. She has only dated men in the past
Men are so simple compared to women. Men only need a few things to be happy, and these include food, regular sex and sports!
What do women need to be happy? There is no simple answer. Women are much more complicated and men know it. Lesbians know it, but most bi-curious women don’t have a clue!
Women have menstrual cycles along with cyclical emotions. Women need to talk a lot more than men, resulting in what we know as “processing” in lesbian lands that can take hours. WOMEN FEEL! And all of that needs to be processed, explored, felt over and over again and talked about some more.
Is that bi-curious woman ready for this?
2. You will be his first sexual experience with a woman.
If you’ve never had good sex with a man, you’re in for a real treat. Lesbian sex research tells us that sex between women means more orgasms, longer sex sessions and greater satisfaction.
As her first female-to-female sexual experience, she might become very attached right away (the legend of lesbian U-haul exists for some real reasons!).
Research on lesbian sex tells us that woman-to-woman sex means more orgasms and greater satisfaction.
You’ll also have to be her teacher on what works and what doesn’t when it comes to women.
Are you ready? Will she be able to step forward to give you the kind of sexual encounter you desire? Will she put you down if you like it? (How can you be a lesbian and not like this?!) Do you hate penetration and she loves it and wants it?
Oh, so many things to sort out here.
3 men’s jobs versus women’s jobs
If she has been married, she will start dating women with only a heterosexual version of life and relationship. She will expect a lot of care in the male/female version of the relationship. I have seen this time and time again with women entering lesbian lands after being with men.
While lifelong lesbians tend to address what comes up, the bicurious woman will act impotent or actually believe that she can’t do certain things because a man always did in the past.
In lesbian land, every job is a woman’s job! So why is it important? If you’re not the butch lesbian type, you may find this bi-curious woman demanding in ways you just don’t understand and don’t want.
I’m just saying
Drunken make-out sessions versus sober female-to-female sex
That’s the big change that many bicurious women need to make.
You’ve probably kissed and rubbed some drunk on your straight friends because that’s what’s all the rage these days. As lesbians, we’re seeing this thing happen where straight women hit on women to turn on their boyfriends and fulfill their men’s fantasy, but lesbian sex is a different story.
As women who love women and love sex with women, we do our sex sober. That kind of sex is the best really, when you are fully awake and present to the wonder of a woman’s skin, breasts, lips and wetness.
Is this bi-curious woman up to the task? Can she turn on the lights and raise the curtains and be seen in all her glory and be willing to see you in all your naked glory?
The way men have sex with a woman is very different from sex between women. You need to be open, receptive and willing to let go of what you know about sex with men.
5.Are you bi-curious or bi-serious?
Not to spend this idea, but if a woman is just curious about doing it with another woman, do you want to go there?
Most lesbians will tell you NO. They don’t want to go there. We are not a Kinsey sex experiment for a curious, mostly straight girl to play with and then she can say she tried it.
But before I put words in her mouth, I know some of you would say yes. You’d say yes to sex, the power of knowing more than she does about what will please her, the thrill of being the first and being in control and maybe you’re just horny and she’ll do well for a quickie. .
Whatever your pleasure or preference, like Ms. Bi-Curious, the most important information is what you know about yourself and your own heart. Well, and what your rules are about sex.
So, if this sounds like something you could get into, connect with and enjoy, go girl !!!!
