Celesbians is not a term you’ll find in the dictionary yet. And if you’re a lesbian, you know who the celebrities are in our little lesbian world.
There’s Ellen. We could call her the kingpin of the Celesbians.
She started a movement. She went on TV with Oprah in 1997. That went so well that she was then able to write a cameo scene on her rock star TV show calledtadaEllen!
Of course, with Ellen we also have his lovely wife, Portia. Yes, we know them by their first names. No middle name is required.
Portia’s legal name is actually Portia Lee James DeGeneres. She petitioned the court to change it in California in 2010.
Portia was one of those women who was out but not really. She openly dated women for years, but didn’t come out professionally until she started dating Ellen.
There was no way she was going out with Ellen and not leaving altogether.
This is the point I want to make.
It can come out at all or not at all. When you start dating, your level of outness can become a big problem.
If your potential girlfriend is fully out, it’s doubtful she’ll go back into the closet for you.
She’ll want you to go out, and maybe all the way. Are you ready for that?
“In or out, it’s your decision based
about what you think is best for you.
Only half of life.
As a Gay Girls Dating Coach, one of the areas I help women with is the coming out process.
I meet women every week of all ages who face their truth and decide to take the leap to come out of the closet.
And when a woman recognizes her attraction to women later in life, there are many decisions to make about coming out.
When you’re dating, if you’re both locked in and want to stay that way, then the lesbian fairy godmother has really helped you.
In all honesty, however, you know you’re only living half as long when you spend part of each day in fear of being found out.
A few years ago I had the pleasure of dating a woman who has a very public professional life. She is not in her professional life and does not want to be.
I wanted to go out, go out, go out and it was a problem.
It’s not much fun to go to a special event where there’s music, dancing, good wine and a romantic atmosphere and not be able to hold hands, dance or give your girl a little kiss in public.
It’s even harder to go to that event and have him spend the whole night dancing with men because he hides the fact that he’s queer, even though everyone knows he’s queer. You just don’t talk about him publicly.
It’s one of the main reasons why our relationship didn’t work out.
Get the image?
Many lesbians don’t want to date someone who is in the closet.
If a woman has done the work of coming out at all, why would she want to go back into the closet?
Inside or outside, it’s your decision based on what you think is best for you.
Outside or not, it’s your choice, but you should know that it will have a big impact on your love life if you live in the closest place.