Needy women attract good men. Low-maintenance women attract jerks-or no men whatsoever.
Is this counter as to the you’ve always thought? Did you think that the less you would expect from the man, the greater he’d as if you? Well, consider this:
A Good Man – one who is confident, mature and relationship-minded – desperately wants to give to a woman and make her happy. He must realize that you'll need him and that he’s giving you better already-great life. He needs to know that he is able to WIN along with you.
…as a grownup woman looking to share her life with a grownup man, not expecting anything only gets you the guy who doesn’t wish to give you anything.
A good man also really wants to realize that you respect and love yourself. He doesn't want to be completely accountable for your happiness.
Now, say you’re the gal who doesn’t need anything. Mr. Good Man will NOT pick you as a partner. He may sleep with you or perhaps be your friend…but he won’t marry you.
If you don’t leave room for men to become your hero, and also you don’t reveal that you know you’re worth him, he will leave before you say “Why didn’t he call? or “Why am I always stuck with jerks, users and narcissists?”
On the other hand, let’s state that you graciously receive his compliments and show enthusiastic appreciation for the big and little things he is doing for you. You may occasionally ask for his advice and let him open the pickle jar. You also make and boundaries, expect him to keep his word and expect to be treated such as the special woman you're.
That, along with your kindness to him, tells Mr. Good Man that you’re relationship material. You’re able to welcome him into your life. You're positive about who you are, what you want, and how to get it. And you're simply allowing him allow it.
Isn’t it funny? All this time we thought being low maintenance got the guy. Actually, which was in senior high school. Now, like a grownup woman looking to share her lifetime with a grownup man, not expecting anything only gets you the guy who doesn’t wish to provide you with anything.
So here’s some homework to help you decide what your location is with this particular. Look back on previous relationships and answer these questions:
- Were there worthwhile guys who might have gotten away since you acted as if you didn’t need him and/or didn’t seem to have any expectations of him?
- Do you have a lot of buddies but no romantic mojo?
- Are the men you’re attracting the Good Guys or are they just takers?
- Do you know your boundaries, and do you stay with them?
- How well do you let him know that you simply respect yourself? If your cute guy asks you out of trouble for Friday night on Friday morning, do you accept? When he doesn’t call or turns up late, would you tell him it’s okay because you don’t want to frighten him? When he’s suggesting he’s too busy to see you every week, still hanging on?
- And-how is this working for you?
If you are encompassed by buddies…if men only want to use you or take from you, or you’re completely man-less…listen up!
When you ask for nothing, that’s exactly what you receive. You need to attract a great man? Show him you NEED him.
Here is the action item for the week:
Once a day ask a man for help. It can be help determining the spreadsheet on your pc, lifting a box into your car, assistance with which mechanic to use, or even directions.
This needn't be someone you are romantically thinking about . Only a co-worker, neighbor, friend, a man within the grocery store.
Let him assist you to, show your appreciation and watch his reaction closely. All of us study from each other so please share your experience of your comments ought to below. Can't wait to hear of your stuff!