Sometimes it may be obvious that asking someone out on to start dating ? is advisable. Maybe the two of you had instant and undeniable chemistry when you met on an online dating site. Both of you know it's only dependent on time before you are in a wonderful and fulfilling relationship together.
But let's be realistic. This kind of completely clear-cut scenario doesn't happen for most people. More than likely, there is some level of uncertainty about whether asking someone on a date would be a wise decision or not.
If you're discerning that first date, there are some things that can seem like a very good reason to ask an individual out that aren't always the things they seem. Here are three common (but bad!) causes of asking someone out, and three better reasons that you ought to go ahead and ask them out.
You think they’re attractive
Romantic movies and sitcoms might have us think that any time you have the chance to day someone who you find attractive, you should go out with them. However, it's not always the situation.
Just since you find someone attractive doesn’t mean they’re a great match for you. But it's easy to know this fact intellectually but still be blinded by physical attraction.
Physical attraction is important for any romantic relationship to operate. It certainly would not be smart to date anyone to whom you feel simply no physical attraction. After all, the end bet on marriage and family could be pretty tricky that way.
Despite the importance of physical attraction inside a relationship, we shouldn’t overemphasize how important physical attraction is in the grand scheme of things. Don't miss the glaring reasons that someone is not a good match for you, due to the fact you're distracted by how physically attractive they're.
If you're thinking of asking someone out since they are attractive, ask yourself instead whether or not you're drawn to them on other levels too. Can you honestly state that you find the person attractive in different ways as well? If their personality, thoughts, and spirituality are attractive to you, too, that’s a great reason to ask someone out and obtain to understand them better.
You have something in common
Just because you’ve bonded over something share in common doesn’t mean you need to embark on a date with someone you met online. Maybe you’re discerning a date with somebody that shares you section of work. You like the way that the two of you can talk about things specific for your industry and knowledge base.
The same can be said for sharing a spare time activity with someone. Common interests like these could be a great starting point for getting to understand someone. But having something in common with someone isn’t enough to make it a good idea to ask someone out.
You could share a piece knowledge about someone and assume that the two of you is going to be great in other areas of life. However, you might be missing red flags about the remainder of their lifestyle that'll be completely incompatible with yours. Sharing common interests doesn’t mean that you’ll mesh well, or perhaps that you’ll share stances on important moral tenants you hold.
Much much better than asking someone out since you share something in common with them would be to ask someone out who shares your faith. When the two of you have the Christian Faith (or maybe more so Catholicism) in keeping, you've got a starting place of commonality when it comes to the most important things in life.
It could even be argued that sharing faith with someone you're dating is growing rapidly much more important than having other interests in common. After all, with attraction and eventually love, the two of you can grow in interest and data about other areas of one another's lives.
It's not impossible to make a relationship make use of a non-Catholic, or perhaps someone who's not Christian. However it is going to be difficult to be on the same page together when it comes to intimacy, marriage, along with a host of other essential things.
You’re feelin lonely
We've all had our moments of loneliness. Just about everyone has felt at times like our life will just never get on track in the way we would like it to. Those moments are not the time to take the plunge and get someone out.
If you're feeling desperate, it may feel like you need to do something to try and make things better. However this isn't a healthy emotional or state of mind to be in when you are trying to begin a new relationship. You're not at the best, so chances of things going as well aren't necessarily as high as they could be.
It's not particularly fair towards the person you may well ask out if you do it out of a feeling of desperation, as opposed to a sense of excitement over getting to know them.
If you're considering asking someone out when you seem like this, probably the smartest thing you could do would be to wait. Provide some time. Take some time to get at a more positive place emotionally. Then reevaluate whether it seems like a good idea to ask someone on to start dating ?.
If you look at the situation when you're feeling less desperate and therefore are seeing your lifetime in a little bit more positive terms, and you still seem like you want to date this person, it will be a good idea to ask them out.
Dating somebody new ought to be a thrilling and exhilarating amount of time in your lifetime, not a desperate hope that you'll start to feel good.