Wedding season is in full swing & family events abound. You just started dating someone. Should you invite them to become your plus-one at these events? Good question.
When you're super looking forward to a new relationship, there is the impulse to include the other person in everything. With that in mind, simply because you can bring a plus-one for an event, doesn't necessarily mean you should. Thinking of bringing your new bae to a wedding or family event, here are a couple items to keep in mind.
- What type of event could it be?
Is this a casual barbeque that's taking place inside your uncle Cleatus' backyard or perhaps is this your very best friend's black-tie, formal wedding? Since these things matter. The more formal the big event, the greater consideration you need to put into bringing a plus-one. Seeing a chill family get-to-together is going to be much less pressure for you as well as your date than attending an event that needs a cumberbund. Just saying.
- Have you discussed what this invite means to both you and your date?
My family is incredibly relaxed and we live in close proximity to one another. Therefore, introducing a date to my family isn't a problem to me (they're going to meet in no time anyway, why not have it over with?) However, for some people meeting the family is really a sign that situations are going in a serious direction. Regardless of what type of event it's, be sure you have an open discussion together with your date by what what this means is to make sure there aren't any misunderstandings or hurt feelings later down the road.
- How long are you currently dating?
Did you simply match with this person a week ago or have you been seeing one another exclusively for sometime now? While there's something fun and spontaneously romantic about bringing somebody new to a wedding (consider those rom-coms which are set at weddings), to avoid a total trainwreck you need to be sure you be aware of person a respectable amount before you think about them as plus-one material. Perhaps you have spent lots of hours together? Perhaps you have seen them in other group social situations? This is also another instance best places to think about the nature of the event. If things with your date go wrong at a casual family gathering, it will likely be way a lesser problem than if things break apart at the cousin's $200 a plate wedding.
- Have you talked to the organizers?
This is not only about you. While the person you're dating might be totally amazing, it's still good form to check on in with whoever invited you to see the way they experience you bringing a plus-one. If they haven't met your date before, they might would rather meet one-on-one when they can actually become familiar with them. Alternatively, they might be totally cool with it. This is exactly why you need to ask first.
- How does your date feel about meeting your family and friends?
When it comes to dating, meeting your date's family and friends is generally considered an optimistic thing. However, if you have only started dating remember that your date might not be ready to meet all your friends and family at once (sorry, Uncle Cleatus). Check in together to discover the way they feel and do not take it personally if they decline your invite.