When everyone who are around you is seemingly getting engaged, it can feel like you're the last single person alive. It is a confusing time. Similarly, you're happy and excited for your friends. However, seeing everyone pair off can bring about feelings of loneliness and frustration — causing you to feel like the standard happiness will never happen to you. These emotions could be especially strong when you're still attempting to date and dealing with everything that goes along with that — good and bad dates included. Before you decide to slide down a rabbit hole of negativity and self-doubt, here are some items to bear in mind when your friends start to get engaged.
- Everyone is on their own journey.
It's cliche, but true. Everyone has a different timeline. Just because your pals are married or engaged and you’re not doesn't mean you're “behind.” They are really on a different journey and you've got more things to experience prior to reaching that part of your story. Rather than feeling annoyed by where you are, take a deep breath and remind yourself that you are wherever you should be. Everything may happen when it is supposed to.
- Don't judge your bloopers according to another person's highlight reel.
A writing teacher once told me this and it stuck with me since. What you're seeing now — i.e. your friend's gorgeous, perfectly lit engagement photos on Instagram — doesn't tell the entire story. Social networking rarely does. Good relationships require patience and hard work. Probably, your friends have undergone challenges to get to where they are now with their partner. Their relationship didn't just happen magically like a fairytale or perhaps your favorite rom-com. Instead of feeling jealous, use this as an opportunity to speak to your friends about how they have navigated their love story and what makes their relationship work.
- Appreciate being wherever you are.
“Just enjoy dating!” has become the last thing you want to hear whenever your friends are becoming engaged and you've just swiped left on your third shirtless bathroom mirror selfie from the evening — but it's so true. Dating is fun if you let it be. Consider it: while your friends are trying to figure out how to tell Uncle Arnie he can’t wear jorts towards the wedding, you're able to venture out, speak with new people, eat and drink delicious things and potentially meet someone you really like.
- The grass is always greener.
Which brings me to the next point — while your friends are undoubtedly pleased with their current situation, I'm certain there's part of them that's envious or nostalgic for the freewheeling single life. Let them be! Have your feelings, allow yourself to feel what you need to feel after which get back out there and live. Your. Best. Life.
- Get excited for the wedding.
One of the best ways to stop feeling sorry for yourself would be to celebrate someone else. Be excited for your friends. Show them love. Get excited for the wedding party. Not only are weddings an enjoyable opportunity to drink, eat and become merry, but with romance in mid-air, they're also an excellent place to meet someone. Go in by having an open mind and heart, enjoy yourself!