Have you ever been in to start dating ? so terrible, that you have actually desired to form a boozy support group along with other singles who have also endured exactly the same pain? Six women in Washington, DC were unexpectedly granted that exact wish recently – with hilarious results – when the same guy made plans wonderful them and they decided to ditch him and be friends instead.
It all started a couple weeks ago, when Lisette Pylant showed up at a bar to meet a man a friend had set her up with on her birthday.
Thread alert: so I continue things i think might be a date having a guy my friends set me up on on my birthday (yes it’s a little hazy).
– Lisette Pylant (@LisettePylant) August 7, 2022
However, upon sitting down in the bar, the bartender warned her the dude isn't good news which she should get out of there.
We get together in a bar my friend works at. Said friend proceeds to text me telling me this person sucks and that i should run
– Lisette Pylant (@LisettePylant) August 7, 2022
As predicted, the man is really a total dud, but she decides to remain for this gong-show of a date. What happens next is totally surreal.
After Forty-five minutes, another woman shows up. Such as the plotline of a screwball comedy, this guy has double booked himself. Once the guy gets up from his seat, Pylant decides to inform the woman what's going on, making a new friend in the process.
So 45 mins in his next date turns up while he double books himslef and he decides he’s likely to friendzone me to get away from the situation
– Lisette Pylant (@LisettePylant) August 7, 2022
Eventually, a third, fourth, fifth and sixth women arrive. Pylant lures all of them to a different bar, where they form an epic girl-gang, leaving the man using the tab.
MRS. STEAL Your girlfriend OVER HERE pic.twitter.com/27rY4QJ1EF
– Lisette Pylant (@LisettePylant) August 8, 2022
Near no more the night, Pylant runs into the guy, leaving the bar with no dates (surprise, surprise). When confronted, he defends himself by saying that he was just establishing “pre-date conversations” because he's a “project manager” and “efficient” together with his time. Color us skeptical.
Here's the one thing: there's nothing wrong with dating and/or getting to know multiple people simultaneously. There's also nothing wrong with scheduling two different dates on the same day or night, so long as you leave ample time forwards and backwards and (if necessary) allow the body else know that you've got plans later at night. Inviting six different women to possess a drink with you in 45-minute overlapping time slots is not how it's done. Efficiency be damned, that's just crappy human behavior.
With having said that, if you're likely to date multiple people, here's how to do it right.
Go to various locations.
If you will be meeting two different people on the same day or night, possess the good sense and courtesy to schedule those dates at two separate locations. For example, maybe you want to grab an after-work drink with one person after which head over to another venue to catch a band having a second person. Unless you would like your dates to feel like they're a part of some sort of dating open casting call, do not, I repeat do not, hold court at the same bar or coffee shop while your dates come and go. As we've learned in the story above, not just is the possibility of drama huge, it's also disrespectful.
Allow time between dates.
Your dates shouldn't run so close together they have the risk of bumping into each other. Better yet, schedule your dates on different nights and also at different locations to avoid awkwardness for everybody involved.
Communicate openly.
If you manage to allow it to be beyond the first date or two and things have the possibility to obtain serious, be honest that you're dating multiple people. Hurt feelings happen when people make assumptions about exclusivity. Being honest may go through momentarily awkward, but will make things better in the long run.
Don't be that girl/guy.
As a guide, avoid anything that the man described in Pylant's twitter thread would do – and if you do happen to go down that route, don't be surprised when you get a similar reaction or worse.